Allan Kaprow, Yard, 1961
There are some things in life that are hard to think about complexly until you have had some sort of separation from them. This could apply to a relationship, an event in your life, that paper you wrote at 2 am last week that you could’ve sworn would one day be up for a Pulitzer, etc. During analysis of these things, distancing yourself in time and space cleanses your palette and allows you to be born again, viewing the world with new eyes.
Since I’ve been in Australia, I’ve been studying this idea as it relates to socially engaged art practices. In this sort of practice the artist creates an event or a space that alters how time is usually experienced, with an emphasis on establishing discourse between the piece and the viewer, the viewer with another, and the viewer with themselves. The further I dig into my research and the longer I’m here in Australia, the more I have come to realize that study abroad is not only as a wonderful experience to be had, by also as a shift in personal spatiotemporal realities that facilitate in depth reflection.
Essentially, my experience here is none other than a carefully crafted happening, giving me the space and time to reconsider the complexities of my home reality as I experience my abroad reality. As I transition from place to place, engaging in what I would consider my usual activities, I have a heightened awareness of my self and my minute mannerisms and gestures. In this reality, everything receives a second thought.
One of the main ‘aha!’ moments of reflection that I’ve had so far has come from being more attuned to my anxiety level as it relates to this new reality. Before I left for Australia, I remember being consumed with – generally moderate levels- of anxiety. There wasn’t a decision that I made that wasn’t steeped in ‘but I have to be home by this time or…’, ‘let me ask ___,’or some other excuse that stopped me from getting as much enjoyment out of my life as I could. Although I believe that being considerate of others can be a wonderful practice in life and that it has its place, I also believe that there is a threshold where that consideration stops being helpful and begins being hurtful.
Now, I am able to move freely and exercise my own agency in deciding how I am going to spend my time and energy, without unnecessary anxiety. This new freedom has enabled me to make more thoughtful decisions that I can be confident are safe and a worthy investment of my time. Having this ability has led me to getting involved in some wonderful opportunities where I have managed to immerse myself in amazing communities who have helped me to learn and grow.
Although some of these aha moments bubble up from rather significant issues that I am constantly aware of, most of these moments are found sprouting from the mundane and everyday. I’ve noticed them germinating in my exercise routine, my money habits, in the chocolate biscuits I eat before bed every night. Slowly but surely I’ve been taking note of the little things that strike my attention and diving into the Sontagian nightmare of reconsidering how my relationship with these things have changed and how I’ve changed as result.
Mind you, my experience has not been consumed with constant analysis. Although reflecting and analysis are important parts of studying abroad, you must allow yourself the opportunity to experience things that way you have points of reference. Allow yourself to go on adventures, to immerse yourself in the community, and to build friendships, and then reflect on them later, when you’re relaxed or when you are procrastinating from your other studies. In the words of Ferris Bueller, ‘Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.’
Until Next Time…