I barely had time to get used to speaking and hearing Portuguese after I traveled to Brazil from the US for summer break. And in 3 days I will be going to France; a place of which I do not know the language at all. I am used to cultural differences, language shocks, and awkward situations. But that does not take away minimally how anxious, nervous and excited I am for my trip to Aix-en-Provence.
I have moved to Florida for Rollins. It has been 2 years since I started college, having lived all my other 17 years of life in Brazil. It was a completely different experience for me, living by myself in a place where I have to speak another language, four thousand miles away from home. As an only child, I was also afraid of closing myself to new people and experiences, as I had been used to my own company for the years I had lived with my parents. I remember, I also felt the same way I was feeling right now: not knowing what to expect from this new place. Luckily, that was not the case. I found many great people and lived moments I could have never lived if I stayed in Brazil. I stepped out of my comfort zone, dealt with things I never thought I would be able to, and had the independence I had always dreamed to have.
Having lived through the experience of moving to another country by myself, I feel like I will be able to know what to do in certain situations, and not feel embarrassed by any mistakes I make. Been there, done that. I think that will be my biggest advantage: already being an international student at Rollins. It will be just like as if I was there. Except I don’t know the people in France. And that I don’t speak any French. At all. Also that I will be living with a new family I have never met before.
And I believe that is my biggest disadvantage of being in Aix. Having a sense of similarity to my situation in the US but knowing it will definitely not be the same. Thinking I have it all sorted out can bring me anxiety if things do not go as planned. And I know they won’t. Cultural differences will create completely different situations, which I have to become vulnerable to and understand that it is okay. Understand that it is not all under control and it will not be the same as my experience moving from Brazil to America.
But I believe thinking about these factors now will help me come to terms with not being in control and opening myself to anyone and anything. Especially knowing that Aix is a city full of universities and, consequently, young people, I know I will meet people from the most different backgrounds and most different stories. I will feel at ease, knowing they also have the same fears as me as well as the same ambitions and hopes. Getting to know them will be just like them getting to know me: a contrasting experience that will open our minds to new ideas and realities.
For now, I can only try to remember to pack everything I need. It is a most exciting journey I have ahead of me, and for now, I cannot wait to meet my host family: I will have a young brother and a young sister, something which I have always wished to experience. I hope they are as excited as me to meet them!