As I prepare to board my plane to London, I am filled with both excitement and anxiety. I am excited for the next four months, for the freedom and growth that I know will develop over the time frame, and for the friends and memories I’ll make during my time abroad. I am, however, deeply scared and nervous about the length of time, mostly because I have only spent 2-3 weeks abroad at a time before ultimately returning home. A major part of my identity is being a daughter/sister/grandchild/etc. Therefore, family and those family relationships are extremely important to me. Leaving my parents and my sister for a full four months is a good step in the direction of independence, but I am also concerned just about adjusting to not seeing them in person every other week, or just knowing they are so close. Going to college in state and close to home has been incredibly beneficial in many ways, but the most fulfilling way has been seeing my parents and sister so often and thus keep a close relationship with them. While I know that not everyone is close to their family, I have been grateful the last 2.5 years to maintain that closeness and trust. Being abroad hopefully will only strengthen it. On the opposite side, I have been able to travel before London, to Connecticut to see my grandparents and extended family, most of whom I had not seen in over 2 years because I was working constantly. So this trip has also helped fulfill my duty as a grandchild to people who miss me (and I miss them) a lot.
Some other identities I expect to encounter during my time in London include those who have never traveled/traveled outside of the country before. I understand the extreme excitement and fear that comes from that side. Having traveled to Europe multiple times before for vacation and field studies in the past, I feel more seasoned as a traveler and anticipate the shock value more. However, I myself am still nervous and anxious, and know I will still experience high culture shock upon arrival.
Ultimately, I am extremely excited to meet my future roommates, my classmates, the people at my internship, and everyone else who I will eventually encounter during my time here. I am ready to experience a variety of different cultures and backgrounds, and to fully embrace each one. I think I will meet a very diverse group of people, from those who have lived in different countries before, to those who have not traveled outside of their state; from those who are used to a large amount of freedom and exhibit high confidence, to those who are experiencing their first time living without extreme or strict supervision. Both sides have their advantages and disadvantages, such as over confidence or extreme shyness, but either way, I am open to whatever paths this study abroad experience will lead me down as I continue to develop my own identity.
