As the end draws nearer all I can think of wanting for the holidays is not having to leave Ireland. I don’t want to leave my friends from all over the world, I don’t want to leave my ultimate Frisbee team that’s really become a family, and I don’t want to leave the country that adopted an unprepared and unflappable American girl. Every time I here the words “I’ll see you at the goodbye party!” or “You can come back and visit anytime you want!” my stomach drops just a little more and my eyes tear up because I won’t be living here anymore, which for come reason I can’t even imagine. No more complaining about the abundance of instant coffee, the freezing cold, or how the best nights to go to the pub are Monday and Thursday?
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So this week is filled with goodbye parties and Christmas dinners and exams and essays and all I can think after the past three months is… please, please, please, I need more time. Despite everything I’ve done, everyone I’ve met, everywhere I’ve gone I still have the nagging feeling I haven’t done and seen it all. I need more time and unfortunately that is the one thing I don’t have at the moment.
So, Ireland. This is what I have to say to you. Thank you for grass that feels like a pillow and makes my eyes hurt because it’s so green, thank you for having such kind people that only want to share a drink (whether it’s coffee or beer) and get to know you, thank you for all the traveling and culture I have been immersed in. It seems that I won’t be able to get you out of my heart or my mind, so I’ll have to come back and couch surf with all the people who have offered so far for another three months at the very least. “This is goodnight but not goodbye” as I have said to so many friends, people, and places I have had to leave so many times already.