Hello everyone!
This will be my final blog for the first semester. A semester in which I met amazing people from across the globe, traveled both in and outside of Ireland, and saw sites I only thought existed on postcards. Before traveling abroad I thought my identity could be defined within certain parameters like “sister” “nurturer” “explorer” “daughter,” etc etc. but it wasn’t until I came to Europe that I realized that no vernacular exists to explain who I am. The only word that even comes close is human being.
I have met people who differ so gravely from myself but I found myself meshing with them better than individuals who think just like me. I engaged in controversial discussions, I compared cultural differences, and I fell in love with the kindness and positivity that resides in every individual (regardless if they have directed it towards me or not.)
It is hard to say you feel fulfilled in your life as a 20 year old, but I can honestly say my curiosity for the world and its artifacts has been satisfied and equally grew in interest. I still have 4 more continents to visit and 20 more countries to hit before I turn 30 years old. (30 countries before 30 yr.) but now I feel more confidence in myself, more than I have ever felt before.
Now of course I have advantages in my “on-paper identities”, just like I do disadvantages. There have been occasions where people have made it clear that they despise Americans, there have also been times where I’ve gotten a discount on a meal/supplies/clothes because I am in college. It is because of these experiences that I realized I don’t associate myself as just a student or just an American and I don’t think I should benefit or be discriminated against because of these textbook definitions. I think there is so much beauty to be found in agriculture, history, artifacts, and people.
You can find your peace in your exhaustion after getting off of a 10 hour flight. You can revive your sense of worth by breathing in countryside air. Or you can feed your brain knowledge in a way that only getting your hands dirty can accomplish.
Every part of me aches with gratitude as I look back on my first Irish semester. I have been exposed to a new level of tolerance, wisdom, love, and excitement. Before I came here I was obsessed with times and deadlines and what my future career would hold, and when I got here my whole mindset did a 180. I have never lived truly in the present until I found myself no longer planning what I was going to have for dinner at breakfast time, and by that I mean I let go of my expectations of the future. This does not mean I haven’t worked as hard, or put in as much effort into my future, but it does mean that I’ve taken the time to enjoy my college years while I’m still young enough to.
I tapped into a happiness that I don’t think I would have found staying stagnant. I realized that an adventure lurks around every corner; you don’t always have to go far. Life is a much greater thing than I ever imagined.
There are people who will find this same type of fulfillment in other ways, not just traveling (like I did) some will find it in the perfect career, in parenthood, etc. I’ve always been accepting of these differences between people. But I find the beauty isn’t in telling the tale, it’s in listening to someone else’s. I have learned and engaged in so much and so many things I never imagined myself doing just because I listened to someone with differing views than myself.
Ultimately, I came to Ireland with little to no expectations for the semester. I planned on getting straight A’s, traveling to other countries during my breaks, and experiencing Irish culture. I wanted to find a place to build my home, and I did. I found that place in Soren, Karlie, Tobi, Ville, and Lara. My sweet internashies. I am usually a lone wolf, maybe one or two people at max, but I just felt myself drawn to these people like magnets. I didn’t cry leaving America, but I cried hard at the end of this semester when I imagined all my friends going back to their home countries. More specifically, I cried in a pub to the song “I want it that way” by backstreet boys while telling them how much I loved them. An equally sad and funny moment in my repertoire. Karl shed some tears when she received her last hug on the bus. The others kept on brave faces and maintained their positive outlook. They reassured us that this wasn’t the end of our friendship and was in fact just the beginning. Lara even threw in that now each of us has a home in multiple countries. I know its cheesy to say, but I found a little piece of me in each of them and I have become such a better person because of it. I’m so grateful they took a chance on me. And I am so grateful to have lived in Ireland and gone to Maynooth!
I really hope whoever is reading this decides to study abroad, or at least travel and engage with new people. I think you’ll find a lot more than you bargained for. Wish me luck on my second semester!