As I’m approaching the halfway mark of my time studying abroad, I think constantly about how incredible this opportunity is and how grateful I am to be here and be able to experience a culture different from my own. This exposure to a new culture has come with a few bumps in the road and of course this adjustment period will include some cultural confrontations. I haven’t had very many of these and the ones I have encountered have in no way hindered my study abroad experience. They do, however, come with a learning curve and a few funny stories. One cultural confrontation I have experienced so far in Ireland, for example, has been the different culture at restaurants. In America, dining experiences are about getting everyone in and out as quickly as possible and moving onto the next paying customer. Because of this, you usually don’t have to wait very long to be brought food and drinks and the waiters check on you often to see if you need anything or if you’re ready for your check. This is not the case in Ireland (or most of Europe for that matter). We noticed almost immediately that the waiters take a while to come up to the table and ask for your order, won’t really check on you throughout the meal, and won’t bring the check unless you ask for it. This took some getting used to at first, but we quickly realized how much of a blessing it is to just be able to relax, have a meal with friends at whatever pace you want, and not have to worry about taking up a table too long and getting rushed out the door. In this adjustment period we did learn some tricks that we’ve found helpful to get through a dining out experience here that I thought would be good to pass along:
1. If you’re ready to order, don’t keep looking at your menu. The waiter won’t come anywhere near your table if he or she thinks you are still trying to figure out what you want.
2. Because it can be a long wait before the waiter revisits your table, go ahead and order your food and drinks together. It saves a lot of time for you and the waiter, and it gets your food out quicker.
3. If you need anything from the server or you’re ready for your check, you can usually get their attention by making eye contact and smiling or nodding your head a little to call them over. For me, this felt like a rude thing to do coming from the U.S. so it felt weird, but it’s the culture and it’s usually the only way you’ll be able to get the server to come over to you, especially if you already have your food. It takes some getting used to, but it definitely works and it’s what everyone does, so it won’t come off as rude.
My last tip is this, in experiences like this or any other kind of cultural confrontation, take the time to acknowledge the difference, make the adjustment needed (and don’t forget to make note of it for next time) and don’t take for granted the fact that making these cultural adjustments means you are in a foreign country learning new things and gaining new experiences every day. Not very many people have the luxury of doing what we are able to do and acknowledging that, even in times of frustration or adjustment, is really important. If an instance of cultural confrontation means that dinner takes a little bit longer than it would at home, appreciate that extra time you get to spend with the people around you, enjoying good food, and learning all kinds of new and amazing things during your time abroad.
