Getting to Know Musicians 

Appropriate to this reminiscent time around the new year, I think about the immense change that took place this past year through music. Often the boundaries between music and personal life are weak, as many artistic experiences project the most personal experiences. As someone whose emotional world revolves primarily around artistic experience, my artistic journey impacts me profoundly. Previously, I’ve tended towards avoiding successful, motivated potential peers because of how awful about myself I thought I would feel around them. This year, however, has rewarded me for accepting my insecurities and accepting peers who inspire and challenge me.  

I had a very emotional time at Markand Thakar’s workshop. But I cannot fail to mention the spirit of camaraderie that swept me from a dark and lonely place to one that is exciting, lively, and full of hope. Between the conducting and technique sessions, Fellows and instructors inspired me through their simultaneous devotion to art and compassion for others.  

For example, one fellow conductor and I frequently partnered together to critique each other on technique, yet this friend also stayed next to me on the upsetting first day until we were laughing about silly things. Another brought me a dog to pet!  

This year’s bravery was rewarded immensely with the knowledge that I’m not alone in this struggle between loving art and wanting to succeed. I realized that by finally getting to know people I thought I would never be good enough to know, they are not actually so different from who I am or who I could be. I used to think I had to become too good for insecurities in order to succeed. I can’t fathom ever feeling like that. But living imperfectly and making the choice to persevere even when things are difficult? I can do that.  

Finding my Confidence 

I almost quit music this year because of how unhappy I’ve been feeling about it. In one last attempt to revive my interest, I decided to attend this workshop. The first night of conducting was a disaster. I could sense the frustration and concern emanating from all corners of the room – my mind was fixated on this instead of the music. I knew that I was barely even conducting. Towards the end of the fifteen-minute session, Markand Thakar (Music Director of the Baltimore Chamber Orchestra) said to me: “This is supposed to be fun.” Those words hit me so hard as I struggled to keep the tears down and prayed for my first session to be over.  

The next morning, I was prepared to forgive myself for another difficult session and to keep my chin up. That afternoon changed my life. I swear I almost dropped my salad when Markand looked at me from across the room and proclaimed his advice in front of everyone. I needed confidence, he said. He explained that according to a social psychologist named Amy Cuddy, you can manipulate the body to change the mind. This new approach to confidence was to “fake it ‘til you make it.”  

For years, I’ve been trying to overcome my self-sabotaging insecurities through reasoning with myself. But finally, I learned an additional remedy to my circular thinking… or for once, any overthinking at all. Before the evening session, I went to my hotel room and did some “power poses.” Then I danced to the next session’s piece alone in the room. That night, I stepped up to the podium and said: “Hello, I am the World’s Greatest Conductor.” The players laughed, but the trick worked. I’ve never had so much fun. From now on, I think I will keep faking it.  

Again, I am so grateful to have been able to attend the AAA. I met so many people, and have been left with more questions than answers (in a good way!). I went to a lot of panels, all with grad school in mind. I sought out people who were talking about things I might be interested in studying in grad school. I went to see the presentation of one professor whose work I really admire, but I realized her current focus has shifted. So even though that was disappointing, I’m glad I know that now. I’m also realizing the value of just being friendly to everyone in these academic settings. Of course, it’s always good to be nice to people, but I mean that you never where connections will come from. You can make a friend, but you might also make a valuable connection. I happened to overhear a young woman say she was an undergraduate at a panel, and I introduced myself to her. I felt like we were two of the only undergrads there! She felt the same, and we were interested in the same things research-wise, so we became fast friends. It turns out she did research last summer with someone who was on Dr. Kline’s panel. She introduced me to her adviser, who went to UC Irvine and worked with Leo Chavez. He’s done great work in immigration and I would love to work with him, and she said she would email introduce us. So, it just one of those things where the connections you make are just as important as the things you learn or the work you present.

Leaving the conference, I am more sure than ever that this is what I want to do. Getting to talk candidly about life in academia with a variety of people was eye-opening. I’m not going in thinking that life as a PhD student and then a professor/research is all sunshine and rainbows, but I’m still excited about it, which I think is a good sign. I got a little sad thinking how I won’t be at any conferences next year while I take a gap year. But I think it will be valuable to step away from academia for a bit, realize how much I miss it, and jump back in. I will leave you with some more pictures from beautiful Vancouver!

There’s so much I could say about my time at the American Anthropological Association annual meeting in Vancouver! It was an incredible experience and I am so grateful to have had it. The city was gorgeous, the locals could not have been nicer, and of course, I gained lots of valuable anthropological experience as well. I connected with several people I’d been wanting to meet, and others who I’d never heard of but who I’m glad I met. In this post, I will focus specifically on my poster presentation.

I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect when it came to my poster session, as I have only ever done them at Rollins. Most of the other people in the poster gallery were also students: there were a few undergrads, but most were Masters students or PhD candidates. My poster stood out visually, as the other posters around me were more traditional, with lots of text, and I went for a more modern, minimalist look. Lots of people stopped by to talk to me about my work and they were so thoughtful!  During Family Weekend at Rollins, I presented the same poster for mostly parents, and the conversations were very surface level. But, unsurprisingly, people at the AAA had very interesting insights. They asked me questions about my research, and gave examples of relevant literature I might want to read. It was incredibly supportive! I loved being able to talk through my ideas with different people. Here is the link to the online version of my poster: https://www.scribd.com/document/431211322/Building-Walls-How-Anti-Immigrant-Rhetoric-Permeates-Young-Latinx-Lives

And here is the view from the convention center:

In addition to the rewarding experience I gained from being able to network with others in the same field as me, I was able to gain valuable knowledge in the field of work. Over the course of the two-day symposium I was able to learn about not only the work being done by other schools dealing with this grant, but also incredibly helpful knowledge in the field I hope to go into. With the grant as a whole dealing with archival investigation of integration at the respective schools with each school’s presentation of their work, students and faculty presented their findings in the year or so since the grant began. Because of these presentations, along with talking with others, I was able to gain some knowledge on practices that may improve my own work. For example, one institution mentioned involving the local community churches that were involved with the narrative they were creating. This was done in order to gain a fuller understanding of the stories they were uncovering. This would aid in my work in particular, possibly talking with relatives of those whom I am researching to get more background and understanding of the person. Overall, the conference as a whole provided me with great experience that will be useful in my future work which I was not expecting to gain.

My experience at the Pathways to Diversity conference at Washington and Lee University in Lexington, Virginia was a very rewarding experience. Having never been to an academic conference before I was not really sure what to expect. Worried that I would not be as prepared as others, I tended to over think and analyze my work in preparing. However, after arriving at the conference I quickly learned that it was much more relaxed that I anticipated. With the conference as a whole only including three other colleges in the South, the crowd was knowledgeable on the work that was being discussed and much more forgiving in the sense that it felt more intimate and comfortable. Because of this almost over preparing for the conference I feel I was able to gauge what was truly needed of me to give a confident and educational lecture. With the symposium again consisting of such a small crowd I was able to network with students and faculty from other schools. On the final night of the conference the students from each of the colleges went to dinner together, with this we were able to not only network with other students in the same position as I am, but also learn about their experiences working with the grant and the research they’ve done. I think networking as a whole was one of the most rewarding experiences since I was able to see others practicing in the field of work I hope to go into and discuss with them the ways in which they achieved their goals.

At the Grace Hopper session, I appreciate how personalized that you can make your experience here based on your passions and interests. I attended various sessions to explore my interest in how technologies can advance the healthcare field.

In one of my sessions I attended, it discussed how deep learning can assist with metastatic cancer detection. I enjoyed learning the research how through image net classification can be continually trained to detect whether the cancer is benign or malignant. It was inspiring to see that machine learning can even be more of a powerful source because the computer can rotate the data to get more data points and can average out all predictions. I was amazed on the potential of classification because effective and efficient classification of cancer is vital for treatment.

Another interesting session that I attended was about busting bias in machine learning for cancer research. The pressing problems that the research presented was that clinical trials to test cancer research is slow and expensive, and is not representative of the total population. The research promotes the use of electronic medical records as a great source of data. My favorite point of the talk was the reminder that machine learning is a tool, not a product, so we must remind ourselves to stay grounded on the central reason of why we are using machine learning. This research allowed me to think of technologies in a more holistic approach because with technologies, there will also be obstacles. In this case, machine learning can systemically make errors, also known as bias. The speaker offered strategies to mitigate bias such as continuing to test the technology tools to ensure reliability.

Cristalle Choi

The 4 day conference at Grace Hopper has been one of the rewarding learning experiences for me. One of the main highlights for me was meeting so many people from all over the globe and from various companies, including Google, Microsoft, Cigna, and Amazon. These connections are valuable for mentorships and a close-knit network in the field. As a woman in the technology field, I felt a warm sense of community of women united through the passion of innovating technologies. I also grew closer with the Rollins College students who went to the conference too, who I may have never met otherwise. From the empowering keynotes that highlighted top women leaders in the industry to the interactive design workshops, this conference opportunity allowed me to be apart of a welcoming technologist community. I particularly enjoyed this year’s theme of the conference which was “We will” to speak to women empowerment. The technology showcases and the speakers showcasing their research, including technologies for the mobility impaired and data science for retail, inspired me to go further in my computer science studies because of the seemingly infinite potential of the power of technologies. The diverse conference workshops allowed me to explore the vast technology industry, such as machine learning and product management. I also hope to continue to foster the relationships with the talented individuals that I met.

Cristalle Choi

I had so many amazing experiences in Peru because of the financial help I got from the SHIP grant. We were able to go on many weekend excursions that not only helped show us beautiful natural wonders, but furthered our education of Peruvian and Incan culture. On the weekends we went on a city tour of Cusco, the Maras salt mines, Rainbow Mountain, Machu Picchu, Lake Humantay and Lake Titicaca. All of these weekend excursions happened over 1 or 2 days with tour guides that would explain the history and significance of these sites. My favorite experience from Peru was my visit to Machu Picchu. Cusco is the jumping off point for Machu Picchu and many other sites so it was very convenient to travel there. We were able to talk the new train line and stay overnight in the small town of Augas Caliente. The name originates from the hot springs that are in the town. The town was created essentially for tourists to have place to stay before early morning hikes so the environment of the town wasn’t very Peruvian. But the actual site of Machu Picchu was absolutely magnificent. Machu Picchu was a small civilization for the Incan people but is also a very important cultural, astronomical and architectural site. It is carved directly into one of the eastern sides of the Andes Mountain range. We had a 3 hour tour which began with a history of the Incan people and how Machu Picchu came to be. Machu Picchu was built in the 15th century and is a UNESCO World Heritage site. There are about 200 structures in Machu Picchu and our guide explained the purpose of each as well as the difference between the rich and working class housing. We then had free time to explore all the structures and learn more ourselves. It was the most amazing place. I have truly never seen anything like Machu Picchu before and it was an experience I will keep with me for the rest of my life.

My SHIP funded experience was my Summer of Service for the Bonner Program. Through both Bonner and SHIP funding, I was able to spend 7 weeks this past summer in Cusco, Peru. The area of impact for the SHIP grant was participation in a volunteer or service experience. My roommate and I researched various non-profits who had programs in South America. We were both very interested in being in a South American country in order to not only experience something new, but to help us with our Spanish language skills. We eventually found A Broader View Corps, a small non profit based in Pennsylvania that focused on community service and engagement in areas that need volunteers. Throughout the 7 weeks we volunteered for 280 hours per the Bonner Program’s requirements. We volunteered at two sites. The first was a local kindergarten where I was in a 4 year old classroom with 25 children. The second was an orphanage for children with disabilities. In the kindergarten class I was essentially a teaching assistant and would help the teacher with preparing daily activities and extracurriculars. I even was able to lead my own class periods and teach various ideas in English. I was able to teach the students the colors, insects and other animals in English. Our other volunteer site was an orphanage for people with disabilities that had both an adult section and a children’s section. I worked in the children’s ward. Most of the children have severe disabilities, being both in full body wheelchairs and mostly nonverbal. I would walk them around in their wheelchairs to get fresh air, help with laundry, and help feed the children during lunch and dinner time. Both of these experiences were very formative and it was so nice to be able to immersive myself into not only two separate non profits but in the Peruvian culture.